Puzzle Pieces and World Down Syndrome Day

Watching Kate. Watching her discover puzzles! When she gets a piece in the right section, but now needs it to fit. Isn't that life? How many times we have gotten the piece in the right section, but will it fit into our children's life or the families? Such a simple task, it seems, yet more complicated than we thought.

Kate is five years old, her disabilities delay her to about two. She is saying, maybe eight words. Can you imagine being in her world? Unable to communicate her needs. Therapies have been working on this for years. Now with a diagnosis of Autism, it is all a great big mystery. It is also a great big heartache.

Today is World Down Syndrome Day. Today and lately, I'm in mourning. Kate does have Down Syndrome and THAT I could more than handle. The recent diagnosis of Autism is

killing me. For years I couldn't understand all the disconnects. Why we weren't moving forward. I'm completely heartbroken. Yes, I have to accept this. My fight left me. I'm sad. I need a miracle within myself.

The miracles that continue because of the true Body and Blood of Jesus Christ. We walk with Jesus and because he died for all our sins, He truly walks with us when we take up the Cross. I think about this all the time now. On good days and bad. How can I help Kate? How can I help others understand? How can we have strength when we are so weary and sad? Then Kate smiles. Then she laughs and runs and teases. She looks into my eyes and waits to be covered in kisses and "squeezes full of love"!

When you have to fight every single day and

sometimes every minute because we mom's have a hard time surrendering to the Divine Will. I wish I could just surrender and remember who is in charge. In a funny way, truly let Jesus take the wheel!

I have in-laws who haven't seen Kate since she was 11 months old. They couldn't handle it. I realize now how some people don't have the capacity for unconditional love. Sad. We are all made in the likeness of

I
God yet we fail on so many levels through anger, hatred and condemnation. I guess each Lent will be a reflection of what Jesus did see from the Cross and what we carry as we carry ours.

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