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My "brother" Dan

The title is how I feel.  The reality is that Dan is my cousin.  Our Dads were/are brothers.  Both men now in Heaven.  I am five years younger than Dan.  It doesn't matter now, but back in the day I was the little cousin.  He is so so funny.  He has THE best sense of humor and one liners ever.  I always felt a special place in my heart for him.  What changed our relationship was love.  We always loved each other but it was by jokes and so much joyful laughter.  Then I was almost killed in a car accident when I was 20.  It shook him.  He wrote me a wonderful poem/card about how everyone and how he felt.  Through my life, he was always there, somewhere...  I depended on this.  When my Dad died he was a big part of my strength.  I suffered greatly from depression that first year.  He was "around".  Then Dan's Dad got sick with Cancer.  I loved my Uncle Tom and needed to be there.  By there, I needed to help some way.  In the end, it helped me.  It concreted my Catholic faith.  It brought me closer to my Aunt and cousins.  They became my inner family.  I needed them and still do.  

 I have a thousand Dan stories.  Really funny ones and really sad ones.  I admire him for his faith in God.  It has carried him through a life of joy and bitter sorrow.  The biggest sorrow is losing his daughter Mandy, October 16, 2015 to a drug overdose.  Worst day of all of our lives.  I had no words.  Nothing.  I had prayers and deep sorrow.  Dan has deep sorrow.  He misses his Mandy more than we can imagine.  The thing is, Mandy knows this!  She visits Dan often in his dreams.  I can't ever ever fix this.  I can't take any of this pain away.  It kills me.  At the same time, Dan and I know from losing those we love, life is short.  God is good.  Mandy doesn't suffer anymore.  She is with her Savior.  You may ask, how do you know this, because my Catholicism tells me this.  In a blink of God's eye, we will all be together again.  In a blink!

 So I am writing this very public blog for my "brother from another mother".  We love you.  We need you.  Sharon and you are my family.  As all your family is mine also.  I'm selfish.  Two years ago, you lost your baby.  I can't imagine.  What I can do is help.  Help to celebrate her freedom.  Help to celebrate her life!  Let's remember now!  Her childhood!  Her school years!  Her softball years.  Her young adult years.  What she shared with you.  In a blink, we will all be together again.  Until then Dan, we love you.  I would be lost without your friendship and love.  







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